When do opinions, words spoken without thoughts become judgement or criticism? Maybe downright evil?
Let me tell you a story, sometime ago all I needed was brightness surrounding me, I thought if I basque in light then all my darkness will be gone.
My family believes that dark colors perserve things, kitchen cabinets have to be dark mahagony, tables black marbles, couches of black leather and carpets of indistict dark browns or steel greys…. you get the picture my dear reader?
I decided to re-do my abode in white, white bookshelfs, white tables, white desk and white carpeting or rather off white with little pigmintation, my curtains were white sheer and framing it I bought a beautiful green material of green that reminded me of the forest in the springtime and I made my curtains, with an overlay of sheer ruffles on the top edge imprinted with 3 d butterflies in every color possible.
I had just finished redecorating when my brother decided to stop by, I opend the door he looks, frowns and says:
“You have to get a runner for your rug! White! Who puts a white rugs in their entrance!?”
I got angry and said, “ Well I guess you have to take your shoes off! Or come the back way!” No sooner that those words were out I knew I had made a mistake. My brother head of the family and a “know it all” took my words twisted them, revived them and spread them throughout the family like I had said an evil thing!!!
He told everyone I had kicked him out of the house, that he was not welcome any moore and my whole family believing his words and shunned me ever since.
My punishment was, no holidays to share with family, no birthdays, no visiting, no invitations, not able to see his children and the warm of the family withdrawn and I was left cold on an icy patch of dark winter nights since.
I know he had an accident when he was young and lost some hearing in one hear. Maybe he misheard, maybe he had issues and I was the scape-goat that day… but after months of such treatment I know it goes deeper and I am its victim of his anger.
Now… its way passed reconciliation, what do they say. ‘ Its not the words, but how they made you feel at that moment that will linger and be remember’.
He discusses my eating habits, my religious practices, my life outside my home and stems opinions, criticism and passes judgments, the gossip and malevolent words reach me and purposely injure and creates a wider circle of judgement into my life.
But enough is enough, I will go on, but he shall not be part of my searching for truth and motive no longer! I will hold my head high and if they choose to believe such gossip about me, who am I to stop them!!!!
The joke of it all is, when you go to his house he makes everyone take their shoes and coats in outer hallway so you do not bring the elements inside his home!
“Live a good honorable life. Then when you get older and think back you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.” ~ Dalai Lama